Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Leisure Fantasy

I am sitting at my desk taking a break from work, cramming down a chicken salad. It seems hard to find even a moment to eat. I am in the midst of a lot of activity regarding my church. I do some arranging for our weekend services along with being a worship leader and guitarist. This coming month of Sundays seem to be especially active. As I look at the immense stack of to-do items, I am perplexed.

I believe in creating margin or boundaries in my life. That is, learning to say NO! When I get stressed, I yell," NO MORE!" The trouble is for the past several weeks I have been asking God to involve me in a greater way with what He is doing in His Kingdom . It has taken 30 plus years of walking with the Lord to come to the point where I simply ask, "What are You doing in the earth and how can I be a part of it, Lord?" So why do I feel stressed?

I am always dreaming about my day off. I leap over the tasks I have before me to get to the "down time". I call this my leisure fantasy. The problem is, the fantasy never pans out like I dream. I am just as disappointed when it comes to aquiring things. Dreaming about that new guitar is more fun. Finally getting it becomes sort of a let down after a while.

I can accept being "busy" doing God's work. I am blessed to have the opportunities ; to work on a great staff and lead so many people in worship on a regular basis. My prayer is, "Lord, help me discern what Your work for me is and give me wisdom to say no to the imposters." Even so, I am looking forward to my day off tomorrow.

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